Where You Belong

I recently talked with a friend about things I was struggling with and it touched me. She said "But that's when it's time to forget about all those people around you and where they're at, because you are you and God has you exactly where you need to be." I thought about it and boy is it true. How many times have you compared yourself to someone else. You think to yourself If only I had a their boyfriend, house...etc. We do that often perhaps even everyday.
If you think about it though why do we want to be like everybody else. Their life is their life and why would we want to live it. God has a special plan for you . His plan is so much grander than anything you could ever figure up. You are an original don't be a copy. Rest in the fact that God knows you better than you know yourself! (:
"O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD." Psalm 139:1

My Testimony

I thought I would share my testimony on here since it is a big part of my life.

It all started last summer. I had began to act a little bit not like myself. I was suddenly sad and depressed and nothing seemed to be going the way I wanted. On the inside I was breaking I was having intrusive thoughts that would not leave me. I started to pray the same prayers over and over and asking God to forgive me of my awful thoughts. Nothing I did was working and I started having little rituals I would do to prove to myself that I would be fine. I would be fine for a couple of seconds but then I would just break again. I had enough and went to my mom. I shared with her how much my heart hurt and I sat there and cried in front of her. She soon realized that I need to get some professional help and made some appointments.

That summer was full of doctors visits and etc. I was told that I had OCD. I was kind of lost not knowing much about it. I soon started going to these ladies named Dr. J and Dr. Jaine. Dr. Janie has blessed me in many ways. She has taught me that God will love me no matter what. She has taught me that temptations aren't bad. I have learned that saying prayers over and over that have the same words don't mean any thing if I truly don't put my heart into them. Praying for forgiveness for things that weren't even a sin had been my weakness and still is to this day. She has taught me though to try to conquer the thoughts that say to me "You are sinning Courtney" even when I am not. Dr. J is pretty great too but I don't get to see her as much.
I have grown so much from my struggles and wouldn't trade them for anything. I realize that God loves us so much and that whatever He puts you through you can defeat it with His help. Each one of us battles something difficult but God would not give us these struggles if we could not conquer them.

 I would like to thank my parents and close friends who have blessed me so much through this rough year. I don't know where I would be without them in my life. I of course have to thank God for never leaving my side no matter how stubborn I was.

Lastly I would like to share with you what has become my favorite verse. I decided to pick something in Psalms since I love poetry . I also wanted something a bit different then the peoples typical favorites. 
Psalms 56:9
When I cry out to You,Then my enemies will turn back;
This I know, because God is for me.

I hope you have enjoyed my testimony and what was on my heart. I love you guys and am here to be prayer warrior or anything else you need me to be.

A Lovely Day

Today has been such a lovely day. First off it is my brothers birthday and he is finally a teenager. I feel so old watching him grow into a teenager even though I am one myself. I stayed up late last night decorating our hallway and kitchen for his birthday for him to wake up to. That was a lot of fun considering I like any thing creative. I woke up this morning and did a little bit of school.

I also got to see my amazing friend/big sister Emily. We talked about life, church, books, and blogs. We met at this local coffee shop and it was quite pretty. We had lunch and oh was it good but apparently Emily's lunch was flaming hot because she said her tongue went numb. I came home and edited my blog and that was pretty much my day. God blesses me with so many places and people that I am so grateful! Thank you God for giving me things I do not deserve.

That girl in the light blue is my lovely friend/big sister Emily. (: Go visit her on her side of the web! http://www.emilynicoleblog.com/

This is my awesome now 13 year old brother!

P.S If you have any recommendations of Christian devotional type books to read please leave a comment.

I love you guys!!

Courtney